Before my eyes were even open yet this morning, my very first thought of my conscious mind was exclaiming, "Hallelujah!!!! 'I know that my Redeemer Lives! Christ Jesus the Atoning One. What joy that these sweet sentence[s] give!!! I know that my Redeemer LIVES'" I know that He has already suffered for these pains that my Jonah and I are suffering. He is my Redeemer. He is why I am able to bare this grief. He is why I have peace and strength beyond what I know I am capable of having. My boy is my life!! My children are my life!!! There is nothing harder to bare for me than to see one of my children suffer and know there is little that I can do. For those of you that know me, I am a doer. I am a fixer. I get in and get my hands dirty ripping into walls, cleaning a toilet, building a wall, going back to school, figuring out how to get "it" done. The only way I know to get "this" done is to humble myself and submit myself, my son, and this whole thing to my Savior. I can do nothing except lay Jonah at Christ's feet and submit to His will. I am stubborn!! I am a fighter!! I will mow you over and take you out if you are in my way to reaching my goal. My Heavenly Father has lovingly been teaching me that I really have no power except through my Savior!! Many would think that this is a weak thought, one of a martyr. I know that my Savior is walking beside me!! I can't believe the joy that is literally coursing through my, now weak, body at this time. This is the power of the atonement. I am so thankful for this testimony and the strength and power it gives to me to bear my griefs and pains. I am so thankful that I have been able to call out to my Father in Heaven with pleas, and know that He has heard them and is answering them. So, Hallelujah...HALLELUJAH!!!
(This post is by Jonah's loving mother)